Letting your partner know when you’re happy can also be important for strengthening your relationship. Not only will they feel pleased with your happiness, but it can also be a way of providing feedback about something they have done to help cause your happiness. Feeling as if you are being attacked during an argument can be particularly difficult to cope with. For example, if your partner suddenly accuses you of failing to do something around the house, you might be left feeling upset or overwhelmed. Sheri Stritof has written about marriage and relationships for 20+ years.
If you are feeling trapped in a relationship and finding it difficult to leave, know that you are not alone. Many people struggle with ending a relationship even when they know it is no longer healthy or fulfilling for them. It can be challenging to navigate the emotions involved and take the necessary steps to move on.
If you have children, make sure they practice the escape plan also. Keep the car fueled up and facing the driveway exit, with the driver’s door unlocked. Have emergency cash, clothing, and important phone numbers and documents stashed in a safe place (at a friend’s house, for example). Know where to go if your abuser attacks or an argument starts.
Recognize Your Feelings
If you’ve recently been in an abusive relationship, trust that you’re not alone and it’s never your fault. You can break the cycle of abuse and leave your partner for good, but it requires extensive safety planning, support, and care. Premarital counseling is a type of relationship therapy that helps prepare couples to enter into a long-term commitment. This type of counseling focuses on helping couples develop a strong and healthy relationship before marriage and identify any potential problems that might lead to issues down the road.
Sometimes we stay in relationships long after they’re over because we’re scared of so many things. Breakups through us into a deep dark abyss of uncertainty. We don’t want to hurt our partners, we don’t want them to hurt us worse than they already have, and we don’t want our loved ones – pets, children, family members – to get hurt. Also, we’re scared to be alone, scared of starting over.
You may have had a narcissistic parent that wanted you to be completely dependent on them while simultaneously pushing you away. You may have tried to please your toxic parent to no avail. You may have developed anxious or avoidant attachment as a result. As an adult, you find yourself in relationships with unhealthy people, and it triggers deep-seated issues of not feeling “good enough.” Sometimes our mutual issues attract us to people. Even if you don’t have a friend or family member to go to, you still have a safe option.
Consult early, engage honestly in the process, and do the work. In the end, it’s the work that all members of the relationship put in that makes a difference in the results of the therapy. Therapy can often cause discomfort because you are discovering new truths about yourself and your partner and not all of them are going to be nice or happy. Working on yourself requires that you sit with your discomfort and acknowledge that you need to grow and improve.
The first step in getting out of a relationship is recognizing and acknowledging your feelings. It’s essential to be honest with yourself about how the relationship is making you feel and what you need moving forward. Whether you are feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, or even unsafe, it’s important to listen to your intuition and prioritize your well-being.
Seek Support
It’s crucial to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist when trying to end a relationship. Having a strong support system can provide you with guidance, encouragement, and a listening ear as you navigate this challenging time. Surround yourself with people who have your best interests at heart and who will support you in making the decision that is right for you.
Remember that it is okay to ask for help and support when you need it. Ending a relationship can be emotionally draining and overwhelming, and having a support system in place can make the process more manageable.
