You’ll also feel better by spending more time doing than scrolling. For Gundle, the fastest way to get over a breakup is to develop a story of what the relationship meant to you, and make it no longer than a paragraph. “Is this a story about you struggling to give yourself sexual license and you learned that with him and you can take it with you? ” In other words, reflect on the relationship and all of the positive things it might have brought you—including anything it taught you. By Sanjana GuptaSanjana is a health writer and editor.
Ultimately, I did three months of relationship therapy and learned more than I could imagine about myself and relationships. Today I am married almost ten years to an amazing woman and we have yet to ever raise our voices at each other. In my case, I took the mentality that I needed to learn from the experience to better myself. The payoff is finding and being with a true soulmate. I see so many people who cannot point a finger at themselves and work to improve, and I just shake my head. Unlike unhealthy coping mechanisms (drinking a lot of alcohol, sleeping all day), “purging that anger and loneliness and frustration in a constructive way is so important,” Orbuch says.
Going through a breakup can be one of the most challenging experiences in life. However, there are ways to help you move on and heal faster from a failed relationship.
A bad breakup can stem from a difficult relationship, conflict, infidelity, or other hurts that take a toll on your mental health. This can lead to stress, negative emotions, and even symptoms of grief and depression. Strategies to help you get over a bad breakup can include getting support from loved ones, shifting your perspective, avoiding reminders of your ex, and learning to accept difficult emotions. While it can be hard to cope, it’s also important to take care of yourself and avoid unhealthy coping mechanisms.
The repetition of being in a space you once shared will eventually help you stop associating the person with it, even if it takes a while. Sticking to a routine will also ground you and help you realize that you can still live your life without that person. Take this as an opportunity to give your room or home a little makeover, and add some new accent pieces that will help you make new memories. “Giving your space a little refresh is great self-care—fill in the spaces with something fun or inspiring to see,” Reardon adds.
Accept Your Feelings
One of the first steps to getting over a relationship is to acknowledge and accept your feelings. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or confused after a breakup. Allow yourself to experience these emotions without judgment.
Don’t allow yourself the temptation to look at their profile and see what they’re up to, and don’t post things on social media with the intent of making your ex jealous. In a lot of ways, your past is actually meant to be celebrated. You can look back at what you have learned, how you have grown, how other people have shaped you, and what you have become today, which is all-important. When you acknowledge your feelings in this way, it will help both your mind and body to relax.
Often, we are driven by a reaction to a situation and emotional responses that come up immediately. We get defensive, protective of our own point of view. Things fly out of our mouths, usually what we don’t mean. Knowing each other well means finding a way to talk to each other and address an issue in a respectful and empathic way.
Cut Off Contact
To speed up the healing process, it’s essential to cut off all contact with your ex-partner. This means unfollowing them on social media, deleting their number, and avoiding places where you might run into them.
Focus on Yourself
Take this time to focus on yourself and your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, whether it’s picking up a new hobby, spending time with friends, or practicing self-care.
Seek Support
Don’t be afraid to lean on your friends and family for support during this difficult time. Talking about your feelings with loved ones can help you process your emotions and gain perspective on the situation.
Give Yourself Time
Healing from a breakup takes time, so be patient with yourself. Don’t rush the process or try to numb your feelings with distractions. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and trust that you will eventually move on.
By following these tips and taking care of yourself, you can get over a relationship fast and emerge stronger and more resilient than before.
