Experiencing unrequited love may lead to low self-esteem and hesitation to enter new relationships. One 2020 study aimed to help young adults boost their self-esteem and forgiveness following a breakup through an online therapy program. The first step in the journey toward emotional healing is often recognizing and validating one’s feelings.
Getting over your first love can be one of the most difficult challenges you will face in life. The feelings of heartbreak and loss can be overwhelming, but it is important to remember that time heals all wounds. Here are some tips to help you move on from your first love and start the healing process.
Make sure you also tell your friends not to inform you about what he’s up to if they follow him on social media. I realize that if you have kids together, this is going to be tough. If that’s the case, make sure communication is either text or email and only deals with the logistics of co-parenting. If he starts pointing the finger at you as the cause of the demise of your relationship or tries to win you back, do not respond. You can’t fathom finding love again — an even bigger and better love than you’ve ever known — but I need you to tell yourself that you will. It may be hard to believe right now, but like positive affirmations, the more you say them, the more you believe them.
Give Yourself Time to Grieve
Remember that there is no huge rush, and you want to allow yourself to have the time that you need to grieve. Don’t expect yourself to get over a lost love in one night. It doesn’t matter how long the whole process takes, as long as you do it right.
Plus, your mind will begin to forget about attracting your new person, and will focus more about attracting a rad life for yourself. This new person will just be a byproduct of the incredible energy you have. While you’re doing this you’ll be creating new, exciting, real memories.
When everything else fails, there’s no other way to feel safe but to go home. Make things simple again by spending your time with the people who have known you the longest. There are few experiences in life more difficult and confusing than getting over your first breakup. Being in love or in a serious relationship for the first time is a unique experience, and having that come to an end can be tough to navigate — even when you know it’s for the best. Your first love might have known the perfect things to say when your family drama was spiraling out of control or gave the best back rubs after a long day at work.
Some people might want to rekindle the relationship post-breakup, especially if it was bad. Remember that the relationship ended for a reason, and going back is unlikely to solve the issues that led to its downfall. Instead, reinforce why the relationship didn’t work and focus on moving forward. Remember, taking care of oneself, both emotionally and physically, is a key component in the journey to move past a first love. One can build the resilience needed to continue growing and thriving through self-care, establishing healthy routines, and finding joy in life again. Practicing self-care is crucial when trying to get over a first love.
The role of fantasy in these dynamics tends to be extremely important. It often elevates the potential relationships onto a pedestal, making the reality, or lack thereof, difficult to accept. Instead of putting pressure on yourself to be perfect, make the best impression or make this person like you, take a step back and change your perspective a bit. A first date is simply a chance to see if you have anything in common with a new person.
It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or confused after a breakup. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship and the future you had envisioned with your first love. It’s important to acknowledge your emotions and allow yourself to feel them fully before you can begin to heal.
Focus on Self-Care
During this difficult time, it’s crucial to take care of yourself both mentally and physically. Make sure to eat well, exercise, get plenty of rest, and engage in activities that bring you joy. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can help lift your spirits.
Avoid Contact
While it may be tempting to reach out to your ex-partner, it’s best to avoid contact for a while. This will give you the space you need to heal and gain perspective on the relationship. Delete their number, unfollow them on social media, and resist the urge to check up on them.
Seek Closure
Closure can be an important part of the healing process. If there are unresolved issues or questions that are weighing on your mind, consider reaching out to your ex-partner for closure. This can help you find peace and move on from the relationship.
Focus on the Future
While it’s important to grieve the loss of your first love, it’s also essential to focus on the future. Take this opportunity to rediscover yourself, set new goals, and pursue your passions. Remember that this breakup is not the end of your story, but rather a new beginning.